Fingerprints on my walls

On January 12th 2009 a major earthquake hit Haiti and the city where our son lived.  A week later humanitarian Parole was granted.  Two weeks later we picked up Frankie from Orlando.  

He’s adjusting well to his new life with our family. Many times I think of his mother and wonder what she would think about the journey her son has been on. I am honored to be called mama by Frankie. And I think back to my own life and my journey, and I see how God used my past brokenness and rejection to bring such joy and beauty to my life through the gift of my son.  

The earthquake in Haiti in many ways did what all tragedies do. It exposed the brokenness and magnified the beauty that was already there. It called our attention to poverty and death and destruction. But it also exposed numerous missionaries, common people and organizations, who were acting heroically long before the world started calling them heroes. Our story and Frankie’s arrival home under these circumstances is a testimony to the good work and beauty of others who have worked and continue to work relentlessly for great reality of redemption – that beauty can be made out of what’s broken. 

Our Journey:

On May 26th At 10:21 PM Eastern Standard time the Rhodes hit “send” on our official application in the new journey that we were embarking on…. the adoption of our son from Haiti.

We were excited, nervous, overwhelmed, scared, unsure of what to expect, but confident that this a way we are to expand our family.  It really is such a wonderful adventure and blessing to be in this process.

So what makes you want to adopt?
There are many reasons but I think it is safe to say that “our” desire to adopt came out of our struggle to conceive our second child Izzie.  We had fertility issues and when all hope was gone in me being able to physically have more children, Dave and I as a couple really became open and aware to the idea of adopting.  We had contacted a local agency and had even begun reading through their paperwork when wouldn’t you know it… God decided to intervene miraculously in our situation and thus we have Izzie.  Since Izzie’s arrival I think one of the more interesting things we have discovered is that there was still that desire to help a child in need of a family.  The desire to adopt did not go away. So that is what we are going to do.  God really brought Dave and I on the same page about adoption through our journey and struggles with Izzie.  Isn’t it just like God to use hard times in our lives to set us up for much greater things in our future!

Why Haiti?
Well, why not Haiti?  For us, it’s been more about our journey and finding ways that we can plug into our passions and what God is doing in our lives.  Haiti has always played a special role in my life and through that I think Dave is finding his own place and love for Haiti as well.  So when we determined that we really felt like we wanted to add to our family by adoption, the next conversation was then how will we do that?  Even though we talked about adopting from Haiti even before my trip there this past May, we still were not certain that was the direction we needed to take.  But let me just say, I don’t think we’ve ever been more sure about something than knowing we are to walk this process through Haiti.  When I was in Haiti I really felt the Lord totally confirming things.  There is a HUGE need for people to adopt from Haiti, as well as other countries.  And to these kids it’s not just a matter of if they can have a family or education if someone takes them in, it’s a matter of life and death.   There are children in Haiti dying everyday of starvation (see Liberson’sStory), there are children being abandoned, there are so many children in orphanages that are simply not wanted.   So what better way for Dave and I to play a role of redeeming brokenness in this world.  We long and desire to help and since we desire to adopt what a wonderful thing to be able to adopt from Haiti. Haiti holds such a special place in my heart.

 How Long is the Process?
Here was our time-line…  We were a year and a half into the process when Frankie came home due to the earthquake.  We had anticipated at least another year.  We were told going into it to expect anywhere from 2-4 years.

01/23/10 – Arrive Home in SC
01/22/10 – Frankie to Orlando
01/18/10 – Humanitarian Parole Granted
01/12/10 – Earthquake
11/06/09 – Exit IBESR
10/09/09 – All docs done for HS
10/01/09 – Kim Physical
09/29/09 – Dave Physical
09/25/09 – Fingerprinted
08/15/09 – Have to redo HS
08/01/09 – 1-600A on Hold
07/27/09 – Filed our I-600A
07/17/09 – Home Study update
04/24/09 – Submitted into IBESR
02/08/09 – Waiting to get into IBESR
10/16/08 – Dossier arrived in Haiti.
10/10/08 – Dossier to Haiti!!!!!!!!
10/06/08 – Docs. back from Chicago
09/30/08 – Sent documents to Chicago
09/17/08 – All docs. translated
09/15/08 – Sent docs to get State Authenticated
08/21/08 – Psych Evaluation
08/14/08 – Sent off 2 documents for State Certification in PA and FL.
08/13/08 – Final Home Study Visit
08/06/08 – Dave Physical
08/05/08 – Kim Physical
07/16/08 – Referral of Frankie
07/15/08 – Second Home Study Visit
06/27/08 – Found Translator
06/26/08 – Sent off Application
06/26/08 – First Home Study Visit
06/06/08 – Found Homestudy person
05/13/08 – Received Application
05/12/08 – Contacted Heartline
05/04/08 – Visited Heartline in Haiti

Our Paper Work Time Line:

Committed to Frankie: 7/16/08
Dossier to Haiti: 10/10/08
First Legal: 10/16/08
Enter IBESR: 4/24/09
Exit IBESR:11/6/09
Earthquake: 01/12/10
Humanitarian Parole granted 1/18/10
Parquet: ?
2nd Legal: ?
Enter MOI: ?
Exit MOI:?
Passport: ?
Visa: ?
Travel to Bring him Home: 1/22/10
HOME: 1/23/10

Where are you Adopting From?
During my trip in Mayof 2008, I was able to see many orphanages.  This was good and bad.  It was good because I saw children who had someone to take them in but it was bad in some instances  the conditions of some of these places were horrible and not acceptable.  With the wait being so long my mind began to wonder as to how could I “know” who my child was and know that they were living in certain conditions as we wait for them.  It was just hard to process.  But when I was in Haiti, the missionaries we were staying with told me about Heartline Ministries.  They arranged for me to go for a visit.  When I saw the place I just knew that this could be a place that Dave and I could make our adoption journey through.  Beth and John run Maranatha Orphanage.  They’ve been in Haiti for 18 years and in that time have helped over 250 children.  They are a smaller facility that only takes 20 kids in at a time so that they can help everyone involved in the process have the best experience possible.  Plus they are doing other things there as well to help educate woman so that they can provide for their families and meet the needs of their children.  You can check them out.  They do a better job explaining what they do.  Needless to say, we have such a peace about making our adoption journey through Heartline. 

Can you afford this?
Not really.  But when has that ever stopped anyone who has considered adopting or from doing what they feel God is calling them to do?  We know it’s all going to work out.  We are going to be applying for some grants as soon as our home study is completed.  We’ll try some creative ways to raise money and I’m sure we’ll just put our needs out there at times and let people respond if they want to.  It’s hard for me coming off of my trip to Haiti and asking for support for that and now turn the corner with another need.  But please pray for us these next 6 months.  There are a lot of up front costs in getting our dossier done and at the moment we don’t know where that money is going to come from but we’ll just take it a day at a time and trust God.  It’s kind of exciting to sit back and wait and watch to see how God will work.

Raising a Child From Another Country?
Um, yeah… we do realize what we are doing and have put a lot of thought into the dynamics of our family.  And for us, it’s just a non-issue.  And in a fairy tail world we would love it to be a non-issue for everyone but we know better.  Our only hope is that as people encounter “our family” they will get past any barriers and realize what a wonderful picture of love and redemption all or our family represents. 

My Final Thoughts
Can you physically love an idea of someone or something?  I am beginning to think that you can.  We’ve been on this journey for a little while now and as much as my mind wanders off to thoughts about Haiti I am finding they are wandering off to my son as well.  I have many, many, many thoughts of him already and I have no clue who he actually is, how old he is, where he is, or even if the story his life has already begun…..

I was reading someones blog a while back and they had these words.  I wish I could pen them as my own but they are not.  But if I borrow them I think they tell exactly what my heart is feeling….

Before we met, I wanted you.
Before I found you, I loved you.
Before I touched you, I would die for you.

This is the miracle of love.
ENOUGH SAID!!!!